Miller, born Malcolm James McCormick popularly known as Mac Miller had said just a month ago that he was his own toughest critic and now he is no longer with us. The singer had talked about how the judgment inside his head was more likely to propel him forward than anything else. “I have the tendency to kind of brood over stuff and cook in it” those were his exact word.
The first six months of 2018 was not so smooth for the artist, beginning with his breakup with Ariana, and some days after the split he got arrested for a hit and run and DUI. The artist had hit a power pole with his G wagon and fled the scene but an eyewitness reported the occurrence to the police and they paid him a visit.
A police officer shared with TMZ that Mac Miller was the most polite and nice intoxicated person they had ever seen.
A couple of weeks after his trouble with the police, the singer released three new songs “buttons”, “small worlds” and “Programs” and that made him appear to be in a cheerful place in life at that point. Mac even went as far as wishing his Ex-girl friend Ariana well on her engagement to Pete Davidson.
Mac Miller was out and about promoting his album “Swimming” which came out on the third of August, doing concerts and going for shows. He had plans of going on tour in the month of October and maybe just playing tennis and enjoying the sunshine in Los Angeles.
Miller told Zane Lowe in July with a smile on his face “ I’m back, man, I got another record, Yeah and you look good,man, there’s light in your eyes.”
Miller said the DUI episode was the best thing that could have happened as he saw it as a wakeup call. He said “I lived a certain life for 10 years and faced almost no real consequences at all, I had no version of the story that didn’t end up with me being fine.”
Just yesterday Friday the 7th of September 2018, Mac Miller was confirmed dead at the age of 26. No cause has been identified yet but there are speculations of an apparent overdose
Tributes have since began to pour in from other artists and celebrities. Warner Bros said he was “a hugely gifted and inspiring artist” whose demise is a devastating loss. His family has released a brief statement asking for privacy but took the opportunity to describe him as a “Bright light in this world.”
There has been lots of finger pointing on social media since the singer’s demise yesterday and Ariana Grande’s wall hasn’t escaped the accusations.
The singer had always talked about how people perceived him in contrast to who is actually was and that has led to some digging into the lyrics of his last three songs in search for hints or clues into the recent occurrence.
“I just have always felt as long as I’m 100 percent honest, then it’s just me,” Mac told Nylon magazine in 2016. “It’s a lot easier to sleep at night that way. I’m not saying anyone’s not honest. I think people just don’t know what to make of things right away. I think you have to give everyone some time to let their eyes settle… It’s a lot of ‘Why are you here?’ and that’s a fine question to ask. I think everybody asks that about everyone. I’m figuring it out. As long as I can go to sleep at night and know that everything matches up together, then I feel good about it.”
Miller tried to stay open about his struggles even though he knew it was like fixing himself in a box with the other artists who usually had personal problems posted out there. “A lot of times in my life I’ve put this pressure to hold myself to the standard of whatever I thought I was supposed to be, or how I was supposed to be perceived,” he told Vulture in August. “And that creates pressure…It’s annoying to be out and have someone come up to me and think they know. They’re like ‘Yo, man, are you okay?’ I’m like “Yeah, I’m f–king at the grocery store.” He also talked about how people tend to dissect his lyrics because they knew that he struggled with drug abuse and depression. Dating Ariana also put him in the eyes of the public as everyone went on IG to always check out what was going on between them.
“I have noticed that, as far as headlines and people listening to the music and taking them into account, and applying them to the music. But … I’ve also not talked about what songs mean, what’s this or what’s that. I’ve just kind of left it up to interpretation,” Mac said. “I don’t know if it’s the right or the wrong way or if it helps people digest my music properly or if it doesn’t. I just feel like I worked so hard to make something, and then when I take the kids to college, I have to let them kind of… Whatever happens. I guess I’m just not as concerned with that as I am with having a relationship with music in general,”
With his fame came his drug habits and he was open about it from 2013. He mentioned developing an habit for cough syrup mixed with soda. “The reality is I gained, like, 40 pounds when I was going to MTV and I didn’t want to be fat on national television. I just stopped,” he shared with MTV News. “I kicked it. But it’s addictive; don’t mess around,” Mac added. “I don’t know how down and bad I was—but I guess I was.”
After the release of his 2015 Album, he said “A lot of the music I had done recently was a little darker, and sad—depressing if you will,” he said in explaining the upbeat-sounding title of the album to Larry King on Larry King Now at the time. “And I wanted this album to kind of be a departure from that and feel like, you know, when you go get the paper.” He added “I wouldn’t use the term uplifting, maybe more like confident and just positive,” like the dawn of a new day .
About his addiction to cough syrup and soda he said “I had a little battle. I was having a good time I guess, but it was time to clean my act up and get back to work,” he told Power 105’s in August 2015. “Just accept my responsibility and who I am, and what I gotta do.”
Mac Miller didn’t go to rehab, he shared, but he withdrew for a while from the spotlight to focus on music and his health.
“I thought it was my right as a human to say I didn’t wanna do anything. I don’t feel like touring. I don’t feel like putting an album out,” Mac said. “There’s a lot of space [in Los Angeles], so I could disappear. I was just making a lot of music and I got comfortable in this zone of like, I don’t need to bring any money in, I got money. Just record and have fun—then I realized that I hadn’t put anything out [in awhile].”
There was no “heavy message” behind GO:OD AM, He added. “It’s just a stupid double entendre, where the first half is about grandchildren and then the second half is about the first time I got a hundred grand,” Miller said.
Asides the drug abuse Miller said “I was just pretty depressed,” he told King. “…I think it started [with success]. It’s funny because you talk to people and they say, ‘You know, what do you have to be depressed about? You have money and [stuff].’ I think what was—you know, I’m 18, 19 years old, going through this for the first time, doing it very differently, and I think what is usually just that moment in someone’s life where they’re trying to figure out who they are and what their identity is, it just gets magnified and it becomes a bigger thing because… “Fame is tricky,” Mac concluded, “because you read what’s said about you, then you know what you know to be true, and the lines start to blur.”
He didn’t really know why he was depressed, the congenial artist admitted, and “you want to put your finger on it,” but you can’t. “I just went through a long period where I didn’t wake up very happy.”
About his split with Grande, Mac Miller had this to say : “Life is stressful! So of course there were stressful times. Look, it’s not that unique, you know. I was in love with somebody, we were together for two years, we worked through good times, bad times, stress and everything else. And then it came to an end and we both moved on. And it’s that simple!”
About her engagement, “It’s all positive energy. I am happy for her and [that she’s] moving forward with her life, just as I’m sure she is with me.”
Mac’s Swimming album debuted at number 3 when it first came out and seems to have some hints about what was going on in the singer’s life that led to his final moments. Miller told Vulture, “I really wouldn’t want just happiness. And I don’t want just sadness either. I don’t want to be depressed. I want to be able to have good days and bad day…I can’t imagine not waking up sometimes and being like, ‘I don’t feel like doing s–t.’ And then having days where you wake up and you feel on top of the world.” One of his lyrics about self-care said “I got all the time in the world / so for now I’m just chillin’ / Plus, I know it’s a, it’s a beautiful feelin’ / In oblivion, yeah, yeah /
“Oblivion yeah, yeah.”
RIP Mac Miller, The world of Rap misses you!